Mother’s Day – Abby's Conundrum

We went on a hike for Mother’s Day which was really fun. Caidoc wasn’t super pleased about hiking but I think he was just tired . He hasn’t been sleeping well lately. None of us have!

Husband and I started hiking with the littles because I think it does us all good to get out and unplug. We made Sundays a “no electronics” day which meant no phones except for pictures. But, I found even the pictures are distracting and keep me from fully engaging . So we are now trying no phones at all all day Sunday.

I kept feeling like I was only half way paying attention to things around me. And I hate it. I feel like I’m so busy taking pictures of the kids so that I won’t forget what they are like at this sweet age, that I never even take time to enjoy the moment.

I think I’ve been feeling this way since I got a smart phone. All of maybe a month ago, and I already feel kinda trapped. Don’t get me wrong. I love it. It’s so helpful. Right now I’m blogging on it! But I did predict that I would get sucked into the non reality of it and sure enough- I feel like I did. My electronic flow is much brighter now. Which is a bad thing.

I think I recognized it just in time. So I’m really putting strategies in place so I’m not the person who is sitting on their phone at a party, obsessing over their social media while at an actual social event… I loathe nothing more than when someone whips out their phone in a group of people. Pictures are the exception.

I’m no angel I’ve done it, I know. But I don’t want to look back at a photo I’ve taken and not even remember the actual memory.

I want to be more present with my kids. More focused. I don’t want them to remember me as always looking at my phone- because no matter the reason, no matter how noble, the reason will not be what they remember. I think it also shows them how to not be reliant on electronics themselves. I discovered that the more Caidoc see me read the more he reads.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m on my phone a lot. But I’m trying to limit it to when I’m nursing or naps or after bed time. There is nothing wrong with pictures or social media. I guess what I’m trying to work on the the habitual,almost addictive process of staring at a screen every ten second if even just to “take a cute picture” , or “check my steps” , or “comment on something real quick”. I guess I’m saying, I don’t need it. I can do all that in a focused ten minutes during nursing, then be done for the next couple hours.