Since I joined the Parenting Club on May 17th, 2012, I’ve had some of the most difficult and unexpected experiences of my life. I’m not talking about trials and joys raising a baby, I’m talking about the Club that’s shaping me as a parent. The minute you walk out of the hospital, you’ve joined a new group of people and whether you like it or not, you’re in it for life.
It’s not as morbid as I’m making it sound. The benefits of being surrounded by help and advice and over flowing generosity is truly an incredible thing. I guess my pre-conceived notions are to blame for any negatives I’ve found. I figured that once you have a baby you are a grown up, (of course I thought that once you got married you were a grown up, ‘course I figured that one out pretty quick ;). The fact of the matter is, having a baby doesn’t make you act like a grown up, and I’m finding out most people I assumed were “grown-up” because they had kids aren’t “grown-ups” at all. And it’s depressing.
What do I mean by “grown-up”…Let’s see. I guess I figured that the petty personal competition, selfishness, drama and obsessive behavior was given up at the hospital once you left and you came out being the best version of yourself (or at least trying your upmost) for the sake of the new little life you are responsible for. I’d like to say that I’ve fundamentally changed since I’ve had a baby. I think I have. I hope I have. Some people, haven’t. And now that I’ve joined the Club were I thought we’d all be trying to be our best selves, I feel let down- because that’s not the case.
I know it’s not fair to expect so much of others, and I know by the measure I judge others I will be judged, and that’s okay with me because I expect it and probably need it. I guess I just feel disillusioned. That’s okay though. Not all that glitters is gold.
But some things are…
And they make everything else worth it.